stupid, again.

i feel kinda a bit weird here.. i dont know.. somewhere on the corner of my beating organ.. really, it feels strange since it didn't use to belong there.

and that alienish feeling seems to be so dilemmatic to me. I mean, I don't want to have that but I enjoy having it.. seriously, I thought one is enough.. not again.. oh god.. have i been too chrystal clear again? stupid me, how naive.. and how scary i've become. stop!