trap, old trap

There is something that deep inside my heart and brain I want the most. But it's all I really want. Nothing will ever occupy me for that. Nothing. Not through breaking a bunch of rules. That's just what I want to do, it's not what I have to do. And what I want to do is really out of mind. I have a commitment that I promise not to break. The hell, who dumb I'll be to break my own commitment that's already slipped through my mouth? But, I thought in this circumstance that I settle in was going okay and absolutely fine always meets trouble. The same old trouble. The same old rattling snake that's trying to bite me. The same trap. I know I might be wrong calling it as a trap. But it's all that happened. And I'm caught up in a trap.

And so I lost again..

naive to be fooled once, and dumb to be fooled twice, super-idiot to be fooled the hudredth times.